Championship Wrestling From Hollywood Episode 314 Review

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On this episode of Championship Wrestling From Hollywood, Tito Escondido and Jake Atlas have a good match, we’re introduced to Clarence, and a bunch of other stuff. Click for the review.

To watch this episode of Championship Wrestling From Hollywood, or to check out shows from promotions such as ROH and CMLL, check out the Fite TV app.

We start with Galli and Loquasto talking about an upcoming CWFH show at a comic book store and the Red Carpet Rumble. Want to buy Justin Roberts book and meet Vickie Guerrero? No? Okay, well I won’t waste your time like this segment did. The intro really needs to be changed. You know how pathetic the show looks with a two year old video intro?

United Tag Team Championship Match: Pac 3 (Dylan Bostic & Dan Joseph) w/ Coach Flexo & Water Dicky vs. The Spirit and the Stars (Espiritu [Fidel Bravo] & Astro Viajero [Adrian Quest])

Why is this title match taking place randomly and is being treated like a random match instead of something important? Wait, this is CWFH. All their title matches are random and unimportant. Pac 3 have a new water boy named “Water Dicky” as a way to insult Dicky Mayer.

The match starts off with Pac 3 attacking their opponents. Whoever was directing this decided a closeup shot of Water Dicky was more important than seeing a spot by Espiritu. This was a standard tag team match with Pac 3 beating up on Espiritu for heat. They ripped off Espiritu’s mask and disrespected Water Dicky. Astro Viajero came in for the hot tag. He seemed a bit off in this match, as he botched a few spots. Dylan Bostic did Kazuchika Okada’s Rainmaker and I cringed. Pac 3 got the win after hitting a Powerbomb Neckbreaker combo on Astro Viajero. This match wasn’t really solid. Not a good start for CWFH.

After the match there’s a video message from Vickie Guerrero played. She’s appearing at an upcoming taping. I honestly have no interest in this shit at all.

Chris Strong vs. Eric Watts (w/ Ty Matthews)

I saw Chris Strong’s match from the last Mav Pro show and thought he was solid. He came out strong (no pun intended) to start the match, but this was a bad match. Aside from a standing moonsautl from Strong, this was sloppy, boring, and basic overall. Watts went over, and CWFH’s shitty booking made Chris Strong look weak.

Post match shenanigans: Watts threw Strong over the top rope with a Military Press. Backstage, Dave Marquez talks about the main event cause his fake son wasn’t there. Peter Avalon interrupted the segment and cut a promo. There was some subtle foreshadowing here, but CWFH’s booking team sucks so it probably wasn’t really some subtle sign of something to come. If it is, it’ll mean nothing in the long run.

Dan “D-Man” Parker vs. Guy Cool

If you don’t know who Parker is, he’s a bitter indy goof who wrote a rant about hating modern wrestling that went viral after Randy Orton “Liked” it or something on social media. He’s one of those guys who thinks his style of wrestling is superior, but it isn’t. I remember awhile ago he was on an episode of CWFH and he botched a springboard attempt. This should be a treat.

He did the lamest looking spinning back kick on Guy Cool at one point in this match. This dude has no room to be talking shit on other indy wrestlers if he’s doing awful looking spinning shit in his matches. His uppercuts were also pretty embarrassing. Actually, everything about this guy was embarrassing to watch. He can go on about how Randy Orton endorsed some rant of his on social media, but he sucks. And this match sucked. Maybe he’s bitter that he’ll never get any “FIGHT FOREVER” chants and a bunch of snowflakes from Big Dave? Who knows, but it certainly comes off that way.

Anyways, all Parker did was yell at the crowd cause….heat? Storytelling? Whatever he was going for, it didn’t work. Guy Cool had some decent offense, but Dan Parker’s act was so bad that it did nothing to get the crowd behind Guy Cool. I mean Parker got some heat from a few fans, but it was cheap heat as he played up being Canadian. He also hit the worst Shining Wizard (the most Canadian move ever) I had ever seen. So yeah, he can feel vindicated that a WWE star liked his rant, but Dan Parker isn’t a WWE star and he still sucks. What a waste of television time.

After a commercial break that featured another ad for a phone sex line, we are back at ringside with Peter Avalon at the commentary table.

Jake Atlas vs. Tito Escondido

This was a really fun match. Both these guys started out with some fast paced action with lots of back-and-forth action. Jake Atlas got a good amount of offense in and came off as very credible here. He also had some really nice counters to Tito’s moves. Jake had a very smooth performance, and Tito did a good job at being a base for him. They blended really well with each other in this match. I also have to give tons of credit to Tito for helping raise Atlas’ stock here. Tito eventually won after hitting an F-5. Really good match here.

Post match shenanigans: Tito got in Peter’s face and fucked with him a bit to build up their match.

Peter Avalon w/ the fake Marquez son vs. Dicky Mayer w/ Ryan Taylor

Welp, CWFH has officially ruined Dicky as he’s now doing the same shit gimmick Ryan Taylor is doing. The fake crowd noise was changed up in this match, but it was still terrible. I know the CWFH people are reading this, and I hope they realize how bush league and pathetic their show looks when the people in the crowd all have their mouths shut when that shit plays. This match showcased Dicky Mayer a bit. Peter was working a quasi-Ric Flair style in this. It helped raise Dicky’s stock a bit, but overall it wasn’t really anything worth writing about. This match wasn’t bad, but it wasn’t good. The match was just filler. It didn’t even have a real purpose.

After a commercial for home equity stuff, we get a promo from the Pac 3. They introduce us to Water Dicky a.k.a. Clarence. Clarence lives at home with both parents. Clarence’s parents have a real good marriage. The guy don’t wanna battle. He’s shook, cause there no such thing as half-way crooks, he’s scared to death, he’s scared to look in his fuckin yearbook. He went to Cranbrook, that’s a private school. Fuck Cranbrook.

4 Way Match For The #30 Spot In The Red Carpet Rumble: Big Duke vs. Oliver Grimsly vs. Ray Rosas vs. Tyler Bateman

Story of the match was whoever wins gets the #30 spot in the Red Carpet Rumble, and whoever gets pinned enters at #1. Bateman and Grimsly are also in a bitter, heated feud. Instead of coming right out of the gate and attacking Grimsly, Bateman worked this like a normal match. Instead of violently going after Grimsly, there was a comedy spot followed by a bunch of uninspired brawling. Ray Rosas did a moonsault off the top rope to the outside before a commercial break. That was the best moment of the match.

After a commercial break, Ray and Grimsly had a sequence in the ring. There was a spot where Ray Rosas had Grimsly on his shoulders on the top rope, and then Duke and Bateman carried Ray on their shoulders to help him deliver a Super Samoa Drop. Jarek 1:20 returned to pull the referee out of the ring after Bateman had the match won. The distraction allowed Grimsly to hit a Lungblower for the win. This match had some okay spots, but it was pretty boring overall.

Final Thoughts

This was another boring show. Tito vs. Jake was really good, and Clarence is over with me. Everything else boring and uninteresting as usual.

Don’t just take my word for it. Check it out on the Fite TV app and decide for yourself.

About the Author

Andrew
SoCal's favorite son. Won 1st Place in my division at the 2013 Gracie Worlds. 2019 East San Fernando Valley Water Champion. Keyboard Warrior.