By Silverback, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Staff Writer
Santa Monica, CA – Not many people have ever said the life of a professional wrestler is easy, and it’s likely that even fewer people say that the life of a professional wrestling commissioner is easy. Sure, the commissioner (usually) isn’t being knocked around by highly skilled individuals well versed in the art of hurting one another, but the stress is the real killer. Why, just hours ago, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla (http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com) Commissioner of Wrestling Dino Winwood felt like a million… well, a thousand bucks. Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s next live event, Express Written Consent, is taking place on Saturday, February 21, 2009 at American Legion Hall #308 in Reseda, CA, and some very positive buzz was already building.Paul London would be making his Pro Wrestling Guerrilla debut teaming with World Tag Team Champions The Young Bucks, World Champion Chris Hero would be putting his title on the line against arch-rival Human Tornado, Karl “Machine Gun” Anderson would make his return to Southern California after getting beaten up by a 60-year-old man, and TJ Perkins would be saying farewell to the only home he’s known for his entire life by taking on “American Dragon” Bryan Danielson. What could possibly go wrong?
Well, one phone call later, and Dino Winwood felt like he owed someone a million bucks. The commissioner was diving into his desk drawer for his antacid the moment he heard Bryan Danielson say “Hey Dino.” He didn’t even need to hear what came next, because the only time a wrestler calls a commissioner before a show is if they want a match or they’re hurt, and “American Dragon” already had a match. As it turns out, late yesterday during a training session Bryan Danielson suffered a concussion and was advised by his physician to take two weeks off in order to recover and avoid further injury. Dino then asked Bryan if he knew anyone to talk to about peptic ulcers, but Danielson said his neurologist really didn’t know a lot about gastrointestinal tract. Dino wished Bryan a speedy recovery, and decided he needed to lay down.
Before he could get halfway to his office couch, the phone rang again. What would it be this time? Legion Larry decided to levy an earthquake prevention tax? Phoenix Star forgot that his second cousin Isabella was having a quinceañera on the same day as Express Written Consent? The Shadoloo Crime Syndicate was “offering” protection? After digging even deeper into his bottle of antacid, Dino Winwood told Phoenix Star to pass along Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s best wishes to Isabella, and then tore his phone out of the wall.
What is a commissioner to do? Two cancellations on the same day, and it wasn’t even lunch time yet. Hopefully around 3PM some orbital debris would reenter the atmosphere and crash into his office, then Dino wouldn’t have to worry about anything ever again. Well, 3PM came and went, and the day drew to a close. As Dino made his way through the parking garage he was approached from behind by two males, roughly 6 feet in height, and that’s when he thought his day couldn’t possibly get any worse.
Dino threw his keys across the garage and ran in the opposite direction, screaming bloody murder. I don’t know if you’ve seen Dino Winwood lately, but a marathon runner he is not. After making it about 25 yards, Dino began to have trouble staying on his feet. After 2 more yards, Dino was on the ground, having trouble breathing, his left arm going numb. With one last, herculean effort, Dino rolled on to his back in order to face his would be murderers, but instead saw the faces of what he thought were angels. What were his old friends B-Boy and Scorpio Sky doing there? Surely, he must be seeing things.
Now resting comfortably at Cedars-Sinai Medical Center, Dino Winwood informed the office staff of Pro Wrestling Guerrilla of what transpired earlier that evening, and what will transpire on February 21, 2009 at Express Written Consent:
Making his return from a career-threatening lower back injury, Scorpio Sky will take on one half of Los Luchas, Zokre! Known primarily as a tag team wrestler, Zokre is no slouch when it comes to singles competition, where he will use his speed and agility to his advantage. Scorpio Sky on the other hand, is a bit of an unknown. Is his back injury fully recovered, and if so, will it alter his in-ring strategy? Or will February 21 mark the first step in Scorpio Sky’s journey to singles wrestling glory?
Making his return from the body temperature-threatening Northeast United States, B-Boy will take on his old punching bag TJ Perkins! Eight years ago, it seemed like there was hardly an independent wrestling show in Southern California that didn’t feature B-Boy putting the boots to then-rookie TJ Perkins. Eight years later, B-Boy is still known as one of the toughest in-ring competitors, but TJ Perkins has come into his own as an expert technician and devious tactician. Will TJ Perkins’ last match as a Southern California resident be payback for years of abuse at the hands of bullies like B-Boy? Or will B-Boy first match back as a Southern California resident prove that no amount of experience will be enough to overcome the New Age Punisher?
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s Express Written Consent takes place on Saturday, February 21, 2009, at 8:00 PM at American Legion Post #308 in Reseda, CA and is scheduled to feature:
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Championship Title Match
Chris Hero (Champion) vs. Human Tornado (Challenger)
Six-Man Tag Team Match
Paul London & The Young Bucks (Matt & Nick Jackson) vs. The Dynasty (“The Professional” Scott Lost & Joey Ryan) & The Dynasty International (Karl “Machine Gun” Anderson)
No Disqualification Match
Austin Aries vs. Necro Butcher
Grudge Match
B-Boy vs. TJ Perkins
Singles Match
El Generico vs. Kenny Omega
Singles Match
Scorpio Sky vs. Zokre
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s Express Written Consent takes place Saturday, February 21, 2009, at 8:00 PM at American Legion Post #308 in Reseda, CA. American Legion Post #308 is located at 7338 Canby Ave., Reseda, CA 91335. General Admission tickets are $20 and will be available at the door. For more information, please visit http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com. Card subject to change.
