On Friday, October 24th, PCW brought us their latest offering of live professional wrestling. On the card, Super Dragon battled it out with Angel, Joey Ryan and Hook Bomberry had an explosive submission match, and Johnny Webb discovered his true roots. Mike Vega also showed the world what a whiney, spoiled bitch he really is, forcing Aaron Proctor to change his approach to his role as commissioner. The show kicked off with the X Foundation hitting the ring wearing Halloween costumes. Joey Ryan was dressed as Spiderman, Scott Lost was dressed as Superman, and Funky Billy Kim was dressed as Casper the Friendly Ghost. They bragged about how they would destroy their competition, saying that for Halloween Hook could be a midget, Chippy could be a convict, and that Silver Tyger was in costume every day. This brought out their opponents, but X Foundation ran them off, and then left the ring to a nice pop. Plague faced Big E. Biggs. Plague tossed Biggy around, but Biggy didn’t want to be treated like a little guy. He tried to clothesline Plague, and took the giant down. Biggy dropped two elbows, and then his time for offense was over. After missing a 2nd rope splash, Biggy took a powder, but Plague followed him out and threw him back in the ring. Biggy was thrown to the corner, where he fell victim to a sweet handspring elbow. After dropping an elbow on Biggy, Plague choked him out, drawing a disqualification. Several referees tried to break up the choke, but it did no good until Mike Vega came out and called the monster off.
Mike Vega began to rattle on and on about how smart he was and how he controlled the most powerful man in PCW, and this brought out Aaron Proctor. Proctor said that he no longer wanted to draw attention away from the athletes, and that it was no longer Proctor Championship Wrestling, but it was again Pacific Championship Wrestling. He said that Mike Vega was a drug user and that it’s no wonder no one wants him wrestling for them except PCW. He said that the only reason PCW books him is because Mace, the booker, is a friend with Vega. Vega then said Proctor was an attention whore. He said Proctor was always with different girls at shows, and asked if his girlfriend (who was sitting in the front row) knew about it. He said Proctor always went to other promotions’ shows and went nuts in attempt to get himself a job with Pro Wrestling Guerilla. Vega said he didn’t want a match, but Proctor gave him one with Disco Machine. Disco came out, only for Plague to come out and beat the shit out of him. Plague gave Disco a couple of backbreakers over his knee, and then guerilla pressed him and dropped Disco on his face. Vega started laughing and said no one could stop his monster.
Sexy Chino wrestled Jason Bennett. The stipulation was that if Bennett won the match, the title match between Damage Inc. and Arial Express would be a handicap match; if Sexy Chino won Bennett would be banned from ringside for that match. Bennett opened the match be throwing a fit when Damage Inc. were banned from ringside, then the match started. This was a very basic seesaw match up. Bennett dominated the first part of the match. He used a lot of simple slams and kicks, as well as punches. His first big move was a backbreaker. His next few moves were finishers, each one followed by a two count. He used a rock bottom, a nail in the coffin. After frustration over only getting two counts, Bennett resorted to choking Chino on the top rope, then used a clothesline and a German suplex. Chino turned it around with a neck breaker, and followed up using a series of slaps and a nice belly to back suplex. Chino climbed up top, and when Bennett stood up he got a flying clothesline. After the close two count, Matrix came to ringside to distract the referee, and Preston Scott came to the ring behind the referee’s back to give Bennett the tag belt. Bennett dropped the belt, but was able to hit a full nelson slam, but it only got him two, and Chino recovered to deliver a DDT for victory, showing Bennett what Joey Ryan learned a while ago, cheaters never prosper.
Chippy Sanchez and Silver Tyger wrestled the X Foundation. FBK and Chippy started out with basic Lucha Libre hold for hold, until FBK hit a belly to back, and both men tagged. Tyger and Lost started some very quick mat wrestling, utilizing sit out reversals, escapes, near falls, and everything else you’d see at the start of a collegiate wrestling match. They got off the mat to exchange arm drags, and when they started running the ropes, I thought I’d died and gone to the Anaheim Marketplace. Tyger threw Lost to the outside, and there was his picture perfect somersault plancha over the top rope to the floor. Back in the ring, Tyger threw Lost to the floor again, and when he dove through the ropes, it looked like Tyger caught his arm on a rope and landed badly. This brought the other two into the ring, and as Tyger slowly recovered, the X Foundation took turns double teaming Chippy and stomping him into the mat. Chippy received many a double clothesline, and fell victim to the move where Scott Lost puts his opponent in the corner and flies through the air to shoulder block them in the breadbasket. This move looked much cooler with the cape on, it looked more like actual flight on Scott Lost’s part. After a massive beating, Chippy made the tag to Tyger, who started to clean house. All four men were in, and Tyger gave Lost a top rope ‘rana. Lost was out at two, but Chippy threw him from the ring and planchaed onto Lost on the floor. As this was going on, Tyger rolled FBK up with the low rider for the three. This was one of the night’s better matches.
Lil’ Cholo wrestled Steve Pain in a match that did nothing to convince me that I really hadn’t gone to the Marketplace. Pain attacked from behind to start the match, but it takes more than that to unnerve the Best of the West Champion. After a bit of back and fourth, Pain tied Cholo to the tree of woe, and leveled him with dropkicks. Pain delivered a series of weak looking elbows, and followed up with a neck breaker. Steve Pain seem rather pleased with himself to be in control, much like SoCal Leper is pleased with himself when he foolishly attempts to break kayfabe on SCU’s message board. He started to chop Cholo, but the chops were so weak it was no surprise when Cholo took his head off with a massive lariat. Pain tried to fight his way out, throwing Cholo to the ropes for an attempt at a clothesline, but Cholo ducked and on the way back he hit a float over DDT that Pain never saw coming. At this point both men were at a double down, and Steve Pain was the first to make his feet. He hit Lil’ Cholo with a mighty X Factor, but like X-Pac hitting the move on girlfriend Chyna, the recipient of the move was the real man in the ring and Cholo kicked out at two. Cholo put Pain up for a sit out power bomb, and as if that wasn’t enough, Cholo gave Pain his inverted pile driver to win the match.
From the, ”Oh dear Lord, what the hell is this?” file came the Latino team of Juantastico and Johnny Webb. Juantastico came out slapping hands with the crowd, and slipped me a Juantastico refrigerator magnet. Now I have to of them on my fridge. Johnny Webb took the mic and explained that he recently found out he was a Mexican, and was taking steps to explore his true roots. He cut a promo in broken Spenglish, and proclaimed his love for tacos and burritos. Webb is as Latino as N2X were Japanese. The Stepfamily interfered, and a brawl ensued. Next show the Latinos will wrestle the Stepfamily.
Dante, Apollo Kahn, and Infernal wrestled in a three-way dance to determine the number one contender for the Maximum Title. The match started with Dante being thrown out so Apollo and Infernal could hook it up. Apollo took control of Infernal with a ton of punches and elbows, and then established his dominance with a sweet snap suplex. He also hit a big belly to back, only to have his pin attempt broken up by Dante. Dante came in to wrestle with Kahn while Infernal rolled to the outside, and the bigger Kahn beat the hell out of Dante with power moves and wear down holds. Dante finally came back a bit by hitting an enzaguari when Kahn caught his leg on a kick, allowing him to catch his breath. This was your typical triple threat match, where different combinations of the three wrestlers took turns fighting it out, and the third man broke up every pin fall attempt. There were the typical three way spots, like a three man German suplex, which Dante took the brunt of. During this match Seal took great pride in yelling, “Kill Whitey!” He even used racial slurs like “cracker” and “honkey.” It’s a shame a fine sport like professional wrestling has to be dragged through these murky waters. In the end, Apollo hit a big Alabama slam on Dante, and after Infernal broke up the pin Dante hit a running moonsault on Kahn to return the favor. With Kahn out, Infernal pinned Dante following a nail in the coffin. Infernal is the number one contender for the Maximum Title.
Tag team title match: Ariel Express vs. Damage Inc. Quicksilver and Preston Scott started the match, exchanging headlock maneuvers. The quickness of the Ariel Express allowed for a few quick tags, and the AXE quickly took control of Scott. When Scott finally managed to tag Matrix, his partner didn’t fare any better. When Preston tried to trip the opposition to help Matrix, he goofed and tripped his own partner. This led to dissention in the ranks of Damage Inc. and without Jason Bennett there to smooth things over; it led to a fight between the tag champs. This moment showed how vital a manager can be to a tag team, even if the fans think the manager is there just for looks. Despite the argument, Damage Inc. recovered enough to get back in the ring, and that they did. The champs quickly separated Quicksilver from his corner and cut the ring in half, effectively working over half of the challenging team while his partner looked on. At this point it looked like Preston Scott’s ribs got injured, and he was on the floor while the momentum shifted to AXE beating the hell out of Matrix while Scott stayed on the outside. AXE did all their signature double team moves, and just when it looked like Matrix was in real danger, Scott decided to suck up the injury and get back on the apron. After both members of Damage Inc. had gotten back in, Matrix grabbed Bennett’s Manager of the Year trophy off the apron and tried to hit Scorpio with it, but instead drilled Preston in the head, busting him wide open. This put the champs in real trouble. However, after a little illegal Bennett interference behind the referee’s back, the champs dropped Quicksilver on his face for the three.
Hook Bomberry and Joey Ryan had an excellent submission match. These two started out with a bit of mat work, which would blow up many an Olympic hopeful. Much like Tyger and Lost earlier, these guys worked armature style in an attempt to establish dominance as the premier mat technician. There were a few nice face locks, a sweet Anderson arm bar, and even a dope zamboni sit out reversal. After the mat work they started running the ropes in an attempt by both men to sink in a wear down move, and Joey hit his beautiful standing drop kick. Hook took the kick, but was back in the match to start throwing suplexes. Belly to back, head and arm, German, belly to belly, Hook seemed to know all the variations on the suplex, but what did anyone expect from a contact fighter? Hook threw Joey from the ring, and told the fans to clear out so he could throw Joey into the seats. After the fans cleared, Hook said, “Kiss my ass,” and took it back into the ring. What a jackass. Back in the ring Hook tried some power moves, but Joey hung tight and countered with a power slam. Hook kicked out and started using moves to work Joey’s left knee. After using a series of kicks, Hook locked on the Boston Crab, but Ryan made the ropes. Bomberry attempted another knee submission, but out of nowhere Joey locked in a mandible claw. A mandible claw!!!! After a bit more mat wrestling, Joey sent Hook over the top to the floor, where Bomberry landed on his feet and hurt his left ankle. Ryan brought him back in the ring to do the Flair move where he put Hook’s foot on the rope and dropped hid butt on Hook’s leg. Ryan attempted an inverted figure four, but Bomberry made the ropes. Hook tried another crab, but Joey rolled it into a double underhook dragon sleeper and forced Bomberry to give it up.
The main event was supposed to be Super Dragon vs. Kaos, but since Kaos likes to no show bookings, our main event was Dragon vs. Angel. I have no problem watching Angel, and it was a fine main event, but if I were a booker, Kaos would no longer be an option for me when I went to put together a show. Angel and Dragon started out with some even wrestling, but as soon as Angel started to take advantage, Dragon gave him the boot stomps and threw him to the outside. Angel took off XPW TV Sean’s belt, and started to use it on Dragon. Dragon got it away from him and Angel paid the price for introducing a foreign object. Back in the ring, Dragon tried the stomps again, but missed, and in his rage threw Angel from the ring, and the somersault Angel took off the apron looked like it almost killed him. As they battled through the crowd, Dragon took the opportunity to lay in some stiff chops, and once they made the ring, Dragon locked in his usual move where he uses his legs to tie up his opponent’s arms. Dragon then transitioned his control to a few moves to weaken Angel’s legs some more and slapped on the STF. After the STF, Dragon tied Angel to the tree of woe and stood on Angel’s crotch, Tommy Dreamer style. At this point, Dragon attempted the psycho driver, but Angel squirmed out and hit a mule kick to Dragon’s nuts. Angel hit a Helms style wizard, and then a handspring elbow. After a somersault heel kick, Angel went for the senton bomb, but missed.
Dragon took advantage of Angel’s mistake by hitting a power bomb, and then did his top rope boot stomps, drawing groans of agony from the crowd. Dragon then hooked in a surfboard, and transitioned it into the same version of the dragon sleeper that Joey Ryan won with a few minutes previous. When Dragon tried to build it into a psycho driver, Angel countered it into a belly to back suplex. Angel went back up top to attempt the senton bomb again, but this time landed on Dragon’s knees. Dragon took the opportunity to head to the outside and hit his patented spinning heel kick from the apron, and then two mystery men hit the ring. There was an overweight man and a skinny man, both wearing yellow masks with the rest of their faces painted yellow, and they were wearing black karate outfits. They both approached Dragon with a lot of respect, and then the chubby one lit a fireball and threw it in Dragon’s face. Dragon was not fazed enough to be pinned by the fireball, and kicked out of Angel’s pin attempt at two. Angel hit his senton bomb to get three and win the match. After the match Mike Vega came back out to brag that the yellow men were his pals, and their names were Somo Arigato and Rikki Saki, or SARS. Yep, SARS, talk about tasteless gimmicks. What do you expect from Mike Vega, though? After the match, Proctor came out to say that Vega was out of control, and when Vega crossed him, Proctor said, “At the next show, you’ve got Super Dragon.” Out of nowhere, Dragon got off the mat and gave Vega the psycho driver.
The next show should be a lot of fun. Infernal will be wrestling Joey Ryan for the Maximum title, and Dragon will finally get his hands on Vega after Vega has spent months talking crap on Dragon’s girl over the internet. Johnny Webb will finally show us if his newfound Mexican heritage has caused him to learn any secrets of Lucha Libre style, and perhaps we will see if Foob Dog can learn to run a CD player.
Thanks for reading,
Benjamin Tomas
The Worlds Biggest Mark
