Revolution Pro once again tore the house down this afternoon at Frank and Son’s, putting on seven fun, watch able matches as well as a complete garbage match. I had the pleasure of watching a legend of wrestling in action, and his intensity alone was worth the price of admission. Chris Bosh and Angel both qualified for next weeks Rev J cup, which on paper looks like a killer show. The tag match provided some very nice Lucha Libre, and the main event was exactly what you expect to see in a Rev Pro main event. All that being said, I’ll jump right into reviewing the first match.Big E Biggs, Fire, and Topgun Talwar took on King Jakal, Eric Matlock, and Desire. The ladies started things out trading hammerlocks, then Desire hit a flurry of elbows and a shoulder block. Talwar tagged in, and took the Curt Hennig bump where he gets his ankle kicked out from underneath him and goes right to his back. Technicos manager Little Show started chasing Diablo around ringside, terrifying Diablo. This was funny as hell, as Little Show is about three feet tall. When I looked back to the ring, Biggie and Jakal were running the ropes and hitting a lot of ankle picks for near falls. Matlock and Fire came in, and he treated her to chops, body slams, and a big clothesline. The two girls exchanged a lot of holds and slams, and I’d be remiss not to mention the skirt Desire had on. The last time I saw that much of a female performer’s booty, I paid a cover charge as well as a two drink minimum. I’m not complaining, I’m just saying the skirt was very short. The match broke down to all performers in the ring, and Jakal cleaned house. Matlock got a spine buster, and Topgun got a DVD. Biggie nailed Jakal from behind, and got up top to do a butt bomb. As Biggie got ready to drop, Matlock punched him in the marbles, enabling Matlock to power bomb the big man, and got the 3 with his feet on the ropes.
Mach two featured Disco Machine wrestling Chris Bosh for a spot in the Rev J. The two locked up, and then they hit the ropes; there was a clean break. The two exchanged arm drags, and went into the mutual respect pose that wrestling fans have been conditioned to pop for, even if nothing great or unusual led to it. The early going was very even, with neither man taking a big risk or sustaining the offensive for more than a move or two. Bosh finally strung together a few moves and went for a high cross body off the 2nd rope, only to get a face full of canvas for his efforts. Disco capitalized by working Bosh’s left arm. After working a series of submission holds, Disco danced in celebration, but that only led to Bosh getting in chops. After aching from the chops, Disco went right back to an arm bar submission. Disco tried a choke slam, but as Bosh twisted out of it, he ended back in a shoulder submission. After battling out of the hold, Bosh hit a few chops, and got in a spine buster. He then was thrown to the ropes, where Bosh did a variation on skinning the cat, and Disco was stuck in the ropes. Bosh gave Disco the guillotine leg drop, knocking Disco to the floor, and next was a somersault plancha to the floor. Back in the ring, the plancha had taken enough out of both men for Disco to hit a sick choke slam into a back breaker, and continued to work the left arm. Bosh got out and hit a hurricane crunch out of nowhere, and this match was finished as fast as Yap and Krane’s rumored new promotion will be.
Hook Bomberry came to the ring, and Lil’ Cholo’s music hit. As Cholo’s valet, Jezebel, came through the curtain, Cholo came from the ticket booth and dropkicked Hook from behind, and then with Bomberry on the floor Cholo hit a plancha. If there was any doubt I was at Rev Pro, the second move of the match being a high spot to the floor let me know I couldn’t possibly be at any other promotion. Cholo drug Bomberry into the ring and pummeled him in the corner. Hook got out with an arm drag, then nutted Cholo. Hook worked a long headlock, but Cholo was able to power out and hit a side Russian leg sweep. Cholo put together a sequence with two clotheslines, an arm drag, and hit a back body drop to get two. Bomberry battled out and hit an exploder for two. Cholo missed a dropkick effort, and Hook was in the driver’s seat. After beating Cholo down, Cholo was able to hit a dropkick, followed by what can only be described as a shining sneaker. It was like a wizard, but involved a sneaker to the face of Bomberry. The shining sneaker was followed up with a sit out power bomb for the duke.
I’m not going to call the next event a wrestling match because it wasn’t. Supreme and Lone Star beat the shit out of each other with chairs, tables, and the cement floor. A few early chair shots had Supreme showing mad color early in the match, and Lone Star dominated the early going. I guess they gave him offense so he wasn’t a total sacrificial lamb for Supreme, but in the end that’s what he was. They used a table that refused to break, adding tons of dangerous unplanned bumps. I can see the table’s point; I wouldn’t sell this nonsense either. They bent all kinds of chairs all to hell, and it looked like Lone Star’s nose broke. On one chair shot it exploded like an over ripened berry. I stopped taking notes on this garbage, all I know is that these two did a lot more stupid moves to each other and Supreme finally was declared the winner. As if the show wasn’t at a low enough point yet, they sent out porn star Veronica Caine to offer Supreme some kind of contract. Lord only knows how bad this is going to get, but at least Rev Pro will now be offering a restroom break in between the wresting matches.
El Mongol versus Angel was another Rev J qualifying match. It started with some excellent chain wrestling, with headlocks, reversals, and roll throughs. Mongol took control with moves working Angel’s left knee. They spilled, and Mongrel started dropping Angel’s knee on the steps like Flair used to drop his opponent’s knee/shin across his knee. El Mongol even gave Angel a suplex on the cement. I guess the two just got caught up in the stupidity of the previous match and just couldn’t help themselves. Angel fought back and laid Mongol out, sending him tumbling into the crowd. This one was short, but the fans liked it. Back in, Mongol threw the limping Angel to the ropes and dropkicked his knee. He then power bombed Angel twice on the top turnbuckles, and from nowhere Angel turned a slam into a code red for a submission win. The end was very abrupt, but sometimes things happen to cause quick endings. I hope both men are ok.
The AWS tag straps were on the line as Zokre and Phoenix Star wrestled Piloto Suicida and Acero Dorado. This was another short match, but it was very good. It started out with the usual feeling out and warm up period, then things picked up when Dorado hit a big guerrilla press slam on Zokre. He followed this up with a sweet enzagurai. Zokre hit a clothesline and missed a running shooting star. The Luchadors really picked things up a notch, and my notes on this one are very short, as my eyes were on the match. There was a lot of back and forth action, everything you’d expect from a good Lucha match. Late in the match Piloto was thrown to the outside, and Star hit a scary looking plancha. Back in the ring Star hit another plancha on Dorado, but missed a flip off the top and landed on his head. At this point Piloto hit some moves on both opponents, and when he gloated, he got tossed from the ring. The champs hit a simultaneous springboard leg drop/ springboard moonsault on Dorado to retain. After the match, Piloto and Dorado argued much like SoCal Franchize is gonna argue with any other UPW employee who wants to be in charge of getting Piper his coffee and carrying his luggage while he is in SoCal conducting the $3000 clinic. Here’s to anyone who thinks $3000 is a bargain, you’ll also believe it’ll be worth bribing park employees to open up Big Thunder Mountain Railroad just for your group while you’re all at Disneyland.
Big Babi Slymm, Kenny King, and Ragin’ Bull Manny Fernandez were set to take on Hardkore Inc. in the semi main event. Due to a number of reasons, Adam Pearce was unable to appear. El Jefe decided it was time to recruit a partner for Hardkore Inc. so he offered the spot to Fernandez. Fernandez looked at his partners and decided they were a little too dark for his taste, so he joined Hardkore Inc. and attacked the two black men. In the ensuing brawl, Apollo Kahn came out to even the odds, and the match began. King initially dominated Kidd, and then Al tagged in, only to get beat down by Slymm. The Bull was tagged in to wrestle Kahn, and the veteran took Apollo apart with punches and a belly to back suplex. He tagged in Kidd, and all the Rudos took turns beating down Kahn. Every time Fernandez was in, he showed all the fire I remember him having when I was a kid, and it took me back to my grandmother’s living room watching AWA and NWA. King tried to run in, and when the referee tried to stop him, Kidd took the opportunity to headbutt Kahn in the balls. Bull followed this up with insane chair shots, and when Kahn finally made the tag, it was King’s turn to get his ass kicked. King was doing a fine job clearing the ring until the Bull cut him off old school style, tying him up in hold after hold. It looked like Fernandez was going to get 3 at one point, but King broke it up. This resulted in a cluster bang, and in the melee Al pinned Slymm while Jefe and Bull held Slymm’s leg down so he could not kick out. Nice little brawl.
Super Dagon and Mr. Excitement, the two previous Rev J cup winners, tagged against Ariel Express, Scorpio Sky and Quicksilver. TARO was the referee. Quick and Mr. E started things out, with Excitement working headlocks with emphasis on his opponent’s neck. Both men tagged their partners, and when Quicksilver tried to work Dragon’s arm, but Dragon worked Silver’s arm instead. Dragon went for a sleeper early on, and after some initial success, Sky powered out and tried to apply a lock on Dragon’s leg, but Dragon reversed it and got an ankle lock on Sky instead. Dragon tagged in Excitement, who got double teamed a bit by Arial Express. Dragon put a stop to that with a brutal lariat on Silver, and Mr. E dropped like 4 elbows on Silver, then Dragon came in off the top to give Silver the boot stomps to the chest. Excitement was back in to work a Boston crab on Silver, and Dragon decided it was a good idea to put an STF on Silver while Mr. E held the half crab. TARO ushered Excitement out of the ring, so Dragon decided to use a surfboard into a head stomp on Quicksilver twice. This move looked like it hurt like hell.
As Dragon tagged in his partner, Quicksilver somehow tagged in Sky, who was kicking Mr. E’s ass until Dragon knocked his ass silly with a brutal lariat. Dragon worked over Sky’s back and shoulders, then Tagged Excitement for a fall away slam. Excitement worked Sky over, and then Dragon came in to kick Sky in the head, then stand on Sky’s head just for the hell of it. Sky made it up for a desperation drop kick on Dragon to send him to the floor, and tagged out. Silver threw Excitement from the ring, and both members of Arial Express dove to the floor onto their opponents. Dragon was down, so Express drug Excitement into the ring and double-teamed the hell out of him. Dragon finally pulled Scorpio from the ring, and then got in the ring to throw out Silver, but got caught by Scorpio, who slid back in. Scorpio tied up Dragon’s arms to wear him down, then hit a missile dropkick for two. Sky put Dragon in the tree of woe, and worked Dragon’s neck. After Dragon got out, all four men were pretty much in and out of the ring for the rest of the match with few tags. Dragon gave a brain buster to Quicksilver for two. Mr. E tried an exploder on Silver, but it was blocked. Silver gives Excitement two suplexes, rolls through both and hits a nail in the coffin for two. At this point, Excitement is out of the ring, and it’s Dragon against the other two.
Arial Express decided to give Dragon the violent party in the corner, and then Quicksilver gave him the boot stomps. I guess the idea was if they used Dragon’s moves against him, things would work out. At this point Mr. E got a backbreaker from Sky. Silver hit a spine buster on Dragon for two. Silver then tried a top rope ‘rana on Dragon, only to get power bombed. Excitement hit the exploder on Sky. Dragon got both opponents in the corner at this point, and spent two minutes kicking the hell out of both Silver and Sky. Kicks, chops, punches, you name it. Dragon messed them both up. Excitement covered Quicksilver for the pin. After the match Dragon was nice enough to give Quicksilver the psycho driver, and TARO was nice enough to beat the hell out of Dragon on the outside.
All in all, this was a fun show. Manny Fernandez is awesome, and a legend. Seeing him wrestle was a real treat. I’d hope that in the future Rev Pro continues to gear itself towards the fans that got them to where they are today, and not Supreme fans. To me, what Dragon does is way more hardcore than anything Supreme does. It does not take any talent at all to bleed. I’m not even close to being a wrestler and I could bleed all over and go through tables. I could be lit on fire, but I wouldn’t be a wrestler. I could fall off a scaffold, and I wouldn’t be a wrestler. The point I’m trying to make is that wrestlers have agility, dexterity, timing, focus, and determination. To be a good wrestler takes training, not just a high tolerance for pain. Mick Foley had the tolerance, but also a mind for psychology. That’s what separated Mick from all the others. He understood that sick bumps happen for a reason, and not just to pop the crowd. Sure, Mick did some stupid shit, but at the end of the day he knew the risk he was taking. It’s a lesson he learned form guys like Funk and Fernandez. Well, it’s time for me to stop preaching and say goodbye. For those of you who pray, please do so for my grandfather, Vern. He is in the hospital, and could use some prayers.. Much love, grandpa, you know I’m in your corner.
Thanks for reading,
Benjamin Tomas
The Worlds Biggest Mark
