By Silverback, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Staff Writer
Reseda, CA – With Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s (http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com) Threemendous II going down in the books as a huge success, it is now time to follow in the footsteps of many other great promotions and acts, and take this show on the road. We are proud to announce that on Friday, August 28, 2009 at 8:00PM, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla will embark on the Speed of Sound tour, bringing our unique brand of professional wrestling to fans all around the world. The single day, single venue tour will start and end in the historic city of Reseda, in sunny California, at the famed American Legion Post #308 on Friday the 28th.
While the Speed of Sound tour will stop in as many locations as possible, there is a chance that we may not visit whatever remote locale you call home. Fear not, there will be an eventual tour DVD release, and perhaps next year, if your city reaches the level of a thriving metropolis such as Reseda, we may end up in your neck of the woods.
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s Speed of Sound takes place on Friday, August 28, 2009 at American Legion Post #308 in Reseda, CA, and will feature:Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Championship Title Match
Chris Hero vs. Roderick Strong
— After defeating Joey Ryan at Threemendous II, Chris Hero‘s path to becoming the longest reigning Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Champion is clear. However, there has been much criticism directed at Hero because while he has surpassed Joey’s reign in terms of length, he is nowhere near Joey’s record of title defenses. In fact, while Chris Hero has surpassed the average number of defenses for a Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Champion (5.34 defenses, avg.), he isn’t even half way to beating Joey’s record (Joey’s nineteen to Hero’s nine). So while the length of Hero’s reign is impressive, statistically speaking, he is nowhere near the type of champion Joey Ryan was. And if there is one person in the company that statistics are important to, it’s Roderick Strong.
Wearing reading glasses and a bankers green eyeshade, and equipped with his copy of the 2009 Pro Football Prospectus, along with print outs from ESPN.com and Football Outsiders, Roderick Strong spent the majority of his time backstage at Threemendous II elbow deep in stats. After all, the Fantasy Football season is fast approaching, and if Roderick doesn’t have a strong draft lineup prepared, the Tampa Teabaggers‘ season could be over before it even begins. But when Roderick took a moment to examine the 2009 Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Prospectus, he was shocked to find out that not only did he defeat Chris Hero in singles competition (at It’s a Gift… and a Curse), but thanks to the overall wins-to-tile shot ratio (determined by a number of factors, including opponents’ WER, or Wrestler Efficiency Rating, et al.), Roderick Strong was in line for a title shot. “Bro, if stats can make a boring sport like baseball marginally interesting, imagine what they could do for professional wrestling!” quipped Strong, who holds a MBA (Business) from the University of South Florida.
If Roderick Strong can defeat Chris Hero to capture the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Championship at Speed of Sound, all those years of studying and putting education first will pay some very unexpected dividends. And it could usher in a new era of statistically analysis to professional wrestling! However, if Chris Hero manages to once again retain the championship, he will have proven that not only is he an above-average Champion, but that at the end of the day, stats are for nerds, bro.
Non-Title Tag Team Match
The Young Bucks (Matt & Nick Jackson) vs. The Dynasty International (Karl “Machine Gun” Anderson & Joey Ryan)
— When Matt and Nick Jackson, The Young Bucks, successfully defended the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Tag Team Championship three times in one evening at DDT4, they discovered what happens when companies allow the ¡ACIDENTES! 888-8888 guy to draw up championship contracts. Typically, champions have ninety days from the date of their last defense until they must once again defend the title. While the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Board of Directors can make exceptions from time to time, the rule is usually followed. However, due to a rather large loophole in the contracts drawn up by Señor Ocho Ocho Ocho in the early days of Pro Wrestling Guerrilla, the ninety day periods accrue, meaning that in one night, The Young Bucks bought themselves nine months free of title defenses.
Of course, The Young Bucks say that once top contenders to their championship present themselves, they would be more than happy to put the titles on the line. But with Kenny Omega out of the country, and Chuck Taylor and El Generico facing off at Speed of Sound to determine the Number One contenders, the Bucks claim that there are simply no teams deserving of a title shot. Karl “Machine Gun” Anderson and Joey Ryan beg to differ.
Their history as a tag team is legendary, at least on Joey Ryan and Karl Anderson’s respective Twitter accounts (@joeymagnumryan & @Machinegunka), and thanks to that history, they believe that The Dynasty International should be next in line for a shot at the World Tag Team Championship. However, much like 2 Skinny Black Guys, Anderson and Ryan have not teamed in Pro Wrestling Guerrilla often enough to warrant a title shot. However, if The Dynasty International is able to follow in the footsteps of Generico & Tornado and pick up a victory over The Young Bucks at Speed of Sound, they will definitely find themselves in the title picture.
Special Grudge Match
“American Dragon” Bryan Danielson vs. Brian Kendrick
— When Brian Kendrick was last seen on the independent professional wrestling circuit over four years ago, Pro Wrestling Guerrilla had established itself as (probably) the greatest professional wrestling promotion in the universe, Rick Knox had a flowing head of hair, and “American Dragon” Bryan Danielson was widely regarded as the best wrestler in the entire world. Sadly, today only two of those three statements remain true, but according to Brian Kendrick, it’s impossible for any of those things to be true.
Without Brian Kendrick in their lives, fans of Pro Wrestling Guerrilla didn’t know they were missing. Sure, it’s great if some lackwits think you’re the best wrestler in the world, but that’s just because Brian Kendrick isn’t standing next to you. It’s easy to call yourselves the greatest promotion in the universe, but the second Brian Kendrick Pro Wrestling opens its’ doors, everyone else is going out of business. And it’s easy to pretend like the ravages of Male Pattern Baldness haven’t effected you, but one look at the long, luxurious locks of Brian Kendrick tells you otherwise.
A world without Brian Kendrick is not a world that Brian Kendrick wants to live in. That’s why on August 28, at Speed of Sound, Brian Kendrick will return to Pro Wrestling Guerrilla and show the fans exactly what they’ve been missing, and why they’re better off now than they have ever been before. Bryan Danielson, on the other hand, is wondering why everyone he knows from the Texas Wrestling Academy is now completely insane.
Reseda Street Fight for Number One Contendership to the World Tag Team Championship
El Generico vs. Chuck Taylor
— DDT4 was a major turning point for the tag team division in Pro Wrestling Guerrilla. A series of very close pinfall attempts on The Young Bucks lead to many fans believing that Kenny Omega and Chuck Taylor, the Men of Low Moral Fiber, should be, if not Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Tag Team Champions, at least in line for another shot at the titles. At Threemendous II, the tag team landscape changed once again when El Generico and Human Tornado, the newly reunited 2 Skinny Black Guys, were able to defeat the Champions in a non-title bout. A strong case could be made for either team to be Number One Contenders to the World Tag Team Championship, however very few battles in professional wrestling are solved via arbitration, let alone ones this heated.
For months, the Men of Low Moral Fiber have been verbally abusing El Generico, and threatening him with physical violence, only for a series of chance interruptions to prevent an attack from taking place. At Threemendous II, the rivalry was taken to a new level when Chuck Taylor attacked El Generico from behind, then stated his team were the rightful top contenders. At Speed of Sound, months of verbal and now physical abuse will come to a head when Chuck Taylor, representing the Men of Low Moral Fiber, will take on El Generico, representing 2 Skinny Black Guys, in a Reseda Street Fight to determine the Number One Contenders to the Pro Wrestling Guerrilla World Tag Team Championship.
Omega and Taylor have stated in the past that they own the streets of Reseda, so it would seem that this type of match would favor Chuckie T. On top of that, Chuck Taylor has some strong words for El Generico: “Go ahead and laugh it up with your buddy Cabana, but after Speed of Sound, you’ll be drinking your tacos through a straw, amigo.”
However, El Generico has never had a street fight, No Disqualification, or Guerrilla Warfare match in his Pro Wrestling Guerrilla Career, so he is the great unknown. It’s not easy growing up on the streets of Tijuana, having to fight off hordes of other children for a carelessly discarded tamale found in the gutter, so one could imagine that El Generico might be in familiar territory come August 28.
Speed of Sound on August 28 will feature three more exciting matches, including:
Singles Match
Colt “Boom Boom” Cabana vs. Scott Lost
Tag Team Match
The Cutler Brothers (Brandon & Dustin Cutler) vs. Brandon Gatson & Johnny Goodtime
Four-Way Match
Human Tornado vs. Shane Haste vs. Charles Mercury vs. Jerome “LTP” Robinson
Pro Wrestling Guerrilla’s Speed of Sound takes place Friday, August 28, 2009, at 8:00 PM at American Legion Post #308 in Reseda, CA. American Legion Post #308 is located at 7338 Canby Ave., Reseda, CA 91335. Front Row tickets are $25, and General Admission tickets are $20. Tickets will be available for purchase online at http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com starting on Wednesday, August 5 at 2:00PM. Any remaining and will be available at the door. For more information, please visit http://www.prowrestlingguerrilla.com. Video recording devices are not permitted. Card subject to change.
