In this edition of CWFH, we look at the first part of the Red Carpet Rumble. Plus we pay tribute to an American legend, Joe Heiken. Click for the review and share the love.
To watch this episode of Championship Wrestling From Hollywood, or to check out shows from promotions such as ROH and CMLL, check out the Fite TV app. The Fite TV app also features the last ROH PPV, Best in the World 2017, featuring Cody Rhodes vs. ROH World Champion Christopher Daniels. Also be sure to check out CXF 8: Cali Kings on the Fite TV app if you’re an MMA fan. You can read my recaps of the non-tournament bouts here and my recap of the tournament bouts here. The Fite TV app will also have the upcoming RIZIN FF event. If you don’t know what RIZIN FF is, well, it’s the new Pride FC. It’s really awesome.
We start with Joe Galli and Johnny Laquasto at ringside. They welcome us to the show and throw it to Karl Mandik. He interviews Vickie Guerrero and “legendary ring announcer” Justin Roberts during an autograph signing. Vickie yelled “EXCUSE ME!” and I’m already miserable. We go back to ringside with Galli and Laquasto. They then introduce us to the Spanish announce team. They talked in Spanish, of course. Two minutes, and there wasn’t a single mention of what was on the show. The only mention of what was coming up was a Heritage Championship match.Terrible way to start the show.
They had a unique intro for the episode. It was nice, but I feel like this would’ve been better.
United Wrestling Network Hollywood Heritage Championship Match: Peter Avalon (w/ the fake Marquez son) (c) vs. Tito Escondido
After a bunch of nonsense, we get our first match. Tito started off by kicking the shit out of Peter, followed by him bitting the F-5 for the win. Tito is the new champion, and he deserves it. I just hope he’s booked well. That was the entire match. It lasted like 27 seconds, just a tad longer than Joe Heiken vs. a Random Woman.
Ricky Mandel vs. Suede Thompson
This match took place after their match at a Maverick Pro show the day before. I watched the match on YouTube, and came out hating Suede Thompson as a wrestler more than ever. Basically the guy went P.C. Principal on the crowd for chanting “Queer Image” at Mandel. Then he did a Dab after shaming them. It was honestly the douchiest thing I had ever seen. He’s seriously like a P.C.A. pledge. Someone tell Suede to check his white privilege, bro.
Much like the Mav Pro match, this wasn’t very good. Antics, crowd/character work, dabs, and bland wrestling. Ricky Mandel is seriously the most boring worker in SoCal. Suede hit a 450 Splash to get the win in a pretty boring match. Honestly, I wasn’t impressed. Joe Heiken did that off a ring apron. He’s way cooler than Suede Thompson. Dude is a blindfolded ninja, and Suede is a politically correct SJW dork. That, and Heiken doesn’t do stupid shit like Dabs. Heiken>Suede Thompson by a million, billion miles.
Manny Lemons vs. Matthew Justice
Holy shit. Manny Lemons’ gimmick was so bad, that even Johnny Laquasto wanted no part of it. Joe Galli made a Lemon Party joke. Do stations like KDOC realize they had someone reference a pornographic image with elderly men? I know I make a lot of jokes about David Marquez peddling phone sex lines to kids, but he is probably responsible for someone (maybe even a kid) going on Google to find out what that is. Honestly, I like Dave as a person. I saw him at NJPW this weekend and exchanged pleasant greetings. However, if I knew about this, I would’ve given him an earful at the shows.
Anyway, Manny’s gimmick was that he’s obsessed with lemons. He even came out with lemons. This was a straight up WrestleCrap-level gimmick. Justice is some metalhead or something with no charisma. This was a boring match. Lemons did a Hulk Up by squeezing a lemon on his head. Holy shit this was bad. Then he won the match. Ugh. I’d rather get choke slammed in the Czech Republic than watch this again.
Backstage, Karl Mandik interviews the Whirlwind Gentlemen. They’re facing the Classic Connection next. Oh God no.
The Whirlwind Gentlemen (Remy Marcel & Jack Manley) vs. the Classic Connection w/ the fake Marquez son
The fake Marquez son came out smiling, despite the fact Peter Avalon lost his belt earlier on the show. You know your show sucks when even the ring announcers are shitting on the awful development of your characters.
The Whirlwind Gentlemen had some decent offense, but the match was boring overall. They did standard face vs. heel tag match. Faces get some offense in, heels worked over one babyface for heat, hot tag, stuff. Aside from the Whirlwind Gentlemen’s offense, this wasn’t really good. Classic Connection won. This was pretty boring. Unless you’re having problems sleeping, I highly recommend drinking some coffee if you’re going to watch this match. Here’s a nice tutorial on how to make a good cup of coffee!
Backstage, Grant was being all fucking loud. He interviews Dicky Mayer. Dicky talks about him and Ryan Taylor vs. Pac 3. What a terrible segment.
United Tag Team Championship Match: Pac 3 (Dylan Bostic & Dan Joseph w/ Coach Flex) vs. Dicky Mayer & Ryan Taylor
I can’t help but to say that Ryan Taylor’s gimmick is just awful. It just doesn’t work at all and comes off as lame. The opening segment was pretty decent with Taylor and Mayer showcasing their offense before a commercial break. During this, I turned on a soccer game and saw an amazing goal. Here’s a clip.
After a commercial break, Pac 3 started working over Ryan Taylor. The standard bullshit tag formula was used again in this match. You know the drill. Heels work over one babyface for heat, hot tag, stuff. Every tag match in this company is the fucking same. Only difference here was that there was a manager getting involved at ringside. The match ended in a time limit draw as Taylor and Mayer had Pac 3 in submissions. Pac 3 run away, and that’s how the episode ends. I feel like this video would’ve been a better way to end the match.
Final Thoughts
Aside from Tito’s win, this was another boring episode of CWFH. That, and there was little-to-no fake crowd noise here. That’s an improvement. The show continues to be mundane, uninteresting, and fails at making anything work. The tag title match booking was really stupid, and is just more of the same shit we’ve seen before. Now we’re probably going to get at least two or three rematches with these teams. Ugh.
As for the Tito match, I liked the way it was done. Still, they took forever to get the belt on him and dragged out the story with him vs. Peter. Now Tito has no credible heel contenders for the title.
Tyler Bateman is involved in a feud with Oliver Grimsly and Jarek 1:20. During the process, Bateman has become a quasi-babyface. He did win the Red Carpet Rumble (SPOILER ALERT OOPS!), but him vs. Tito wouldn’t make sense from a logical standpoint. They’ve also pretty much killed Ray Rosas’ heat. He was back so he could go after Peter and his belt, now he’s got nothing. Big Duke is supposedly gone from CWFH. Scorpio Sky is focusing on the TV title.
So what’s next for CWFH to do with Tito and the belt? This show has really booked itself into a corner here. They’re going to need to think of ways to build up credible contenders for Tito’s title run.
I was told this weekend that Ty Matthews is now the head booker of CWFH. I don’t know what his philosophy on wrestling is, but Marquez sticking to people within his program to book this show feels like we’re going to get more of the same. I’ll be watching these shows with an open mind, as I hope Ty can change the product around. Still, I have no faith in anything done by CWFH. Joe Heiken is the truth though.
