I rarely get a chance to watch Lucha Underground as it airs, but since I’m getting that rare opportunity this week I figured I’ll do a live review of the show as I watch it. So consider this my live stream of consciousness as I watch the September 14, 2016 episode of Lucha Underground.
Prior to the show the movie Outland is on El Rey. This movie stars Sean Connery and takes place on one of Jupiter’s moons (I haven’t seen the movie so I don’t know which). This is an actual conversation in the movie:
“Where is the marshall?”
“Outside somewhere.”
“Outside where?”
Talk about fantastic dialogue.
Lucha Underground starts with a recap of last week’s season premiere, then Joey Ryan, Cortez Castro, and their boss listening to the tape of Mr. Cisco getting killed by Dario Cueto. Their boss says that’s not enough and she doesn’t care about some street punk. This makes Castro mad and he and Joey Ryan have a silly looking fight that didn’t look real at all. It gets broken up and Castro walks out.
Next we are in the ring, Famous B interrupts Melissa Santos and introduces his client Dr. Wagner Jr.
Dr. Wagner Jr. vs. Mascarita Sagrada
This is a real quick squash match. Dr. Wagner Jr. hits the Doctor Driver and it was over. This maybe went a minute and a half.
After a commercial we get a little girl in what appears to be Aztec times with her father dying telling her she needs to keep on fighting the war with the Gods. He gives her a medallion and says she will never age once she becomes an adult. I hope this is Melissa Santos’ back story and there is more to her than just being an announcer.
Nope, it’s Joey Ryan and Cortez Castros’ boss’ back story. She has half of the medallion. In a scene that takes place during Ultimo Lucha Dos Castro comes in and tells the boss that they are getting Dario Cueto. She suspends him. Another commercial. That was quick.
Argenis vs. Mil Muertes
This was pretty one sided with Muertes basically throwing Argenis around the whole match. Argenis got a little bit of offense in, but this was really nothing more than a squash match. Muertes hits a spear then a flatliner for the win.
After the match Prince Puma attacks Muertes and Katrina separates them. The announcers put over how Puma and Muertes are the two bedrocks of Lucha Underground and how it looks like their feud is being renewed. Another commercial. Third one in 23 minutes. Hopefully this means less interruptions for the main.
After the break Dario is in his office looking around. Joey Ryan shows up and offers to join Dario and rats out Castro. Dario gives him some money. For shame.
We cut to Joey and Castro’s boss, whose name tag says Captain Vasquez. Castro comes in and says he wants back and he is on her side. She sends him back to the temple. Then the fourth commercial in the first 30 minutes.
Half way into the show we’ve had two squash matches and a lot of story focusing on Captain Vasquez, Joey Ryan, and Cortez Castro and four commercials. I mentioned before Joey Ryan and Castro should get their own cop show, so I guess this is pretty much what it would look like.
Alright, time for the main event with 25 minutes left in the show. This is a weapons of mass destruction match.
Marty “The Moth” Martinez vs. Killshot
It’s a nice touch to have the cammo netting and ammo cans and everything all around the Temple to really sell this as a big match. I knew going in that with this match there would be lots of Matt Striker associating things with war on commentary. He did not disappoint.
Lots and lots of crowd brawling in this. The problem with these types of matches is it normally devolves down to hit a crazy spot, walk around to next crazy spot, hit it, rinse and repeat. That’s what happened here. The Lucha Underground crowd is always great and enthusiastic, chanting “this is awesome” after spots, but there was way too much downtime between spots.
The eventually get in the ring, and there are lot of props setup outside, like grenades and rockets. They tease Marty suplexing Killshot from the ring to the table, but it never happens. Lots of stuff with ladders, including Killshot hitting a Death Valley Driver on Marty onto a ladder. They setup a 20 foot ladder, and fight on top of the ladder. When Marty does a kick on Killshot on the ladder, the crowd noise seems to be fake. Eventually Mariposa comes out and tries to help. She gets put through a table. Killshot double stomps Marty through the table and gets the win and his dog tags back.
This match had no commercial breaks, so that explains all the commercials in the first 30 minutes. I appreciate matches not getting interrupted by commercials and it’s good to see Lucha Underground understands how a commercial break can hurt a match.
After the credits there was a scene with Mil Muertes telling Katrina he wants Puma. She tells him patience is a virtue and she has waited hundreds of years to get what she wants. It is revealed she has the other half of the medallion that Joey Ryan and Cortez Castro’s boss has.
Overall as far as wrestling goes, this was one of the weaker Lucha Underground shows. There were two squash matches and a main event that was just a series of spots with weapons and lots of downtime between each spot. This may be the first episode of Lucha Underground that I didn’t like at least one of the matches. As for as storyline advancement goes however, this was a pretty good episode for revealing more about Captain Vasquez, Katrina, the overall story with the war of the gods, and we even learn Joey Ryan has child support to pay. Dick money only goes so far I guess.
