Ruben
05-26-2002, 09:47 PM
As you all know, World's Biggest Mark has no sense of humor :( Thus not allowing him to enjoy life. As you all know, I have connections all over the place, and the following is what I heard happened when World's Biggest Mark went to go buy his first new pimpin ride, that he was going to put on dubs, and not drop it since, he himslef would drop it. So this is what I heard.........
::It was another sunny day in California. Corruption in the Rampart Precint of the Los Angeles Police Department was still rampid. Pamela Anderson was still getting beaten by Tommy Lee as he listen to "Smack My Bitch Up" by the infamous English band, "Prodigy", and one Ruben was beginning to take names and kick asses in the best sport in this planet, Football. Meanwhile, one World's Biggest Mark was about to purchase its first car::
Car Sales Man: "Hello, May I help you with anything today?"
Worlds Biggest Mark: "Not really, I am just looking around"
::Five minutes later, World's Biggest Mark is lured to the show room by the smell of freshly, deep-fried ham::
Car Sales Man: "Have you seen anything that you like?"
World's Biggest Mark: "Yeah, I am quite intrested in that Geo Metro that you have over there"
Car Sales Man: ::laughs hysterically, has to dry eyes before he could reply:: "No, really what are you looking for?"
World's Biggest Mark: "I am serious, I am really intrested in that car"
Car Sales Man: "Pardon me, but I think that you need something with a little bit more TORQUE"
World's Biggest Mark: "This is all I can afford this month, my food bill is running high"
Car Sales Man: "Doesnt surprise me, you even drank the grease from the deep fryer"
World's Biggest Mark: ::whipes mouth, belches:: "Sorry,I got thirsty"
Car Sales Man: "Whatever, lets get this paper work started"
::After four hours that saw the sun set on World's Biggest Mark left side, and the right side saw the sun rise, the paper work is all ready and all systems go for World's Biggest Mark new Geo Metro that can only haul 400lbs on a stick shift, and that is the best that the sales manager could do, since the he was getting annoyed at the amount of dead skin that was amounting around the chair that our buddy, Worlds Biggest Mark, was sitting in::
Car Sales Man: "Mr. I only wear one shirt, because that would mean that companies would have to pay extra to third world nations to produce my shirts, and in turn create a whole new booming economy that would force these American Companies out of businness since they would not be able to produce a cheap product from cheap labor to produce a profitable product, thus driving this country in to another reseccion. I mean Mr. Mark, your vehicle is ready in front of the lobby for you to pick up, the attendant will know when you get there, since its hard to not hear you come by"
World's Biggest Mark: "Was that really necessary, fuck you and every kid that ever picked on me. Today, I am a new man, a man with a dream that maybe some day, a company will take it up under its wing to create a chair strong enough for me so that I will be able to show off my purple skinned ankles at wrestling shows, and for my mutants to have the proper transportation to annoy the fuck out of people like one Mr. Ruben"
::As World's Biggest Mark floors it into 1 gear, the torque is not enough to pull the weight inside the car around, thus dropping his transmission before leaving the lot::
World's Biggest Mark: "No not again!, its the second time this week this has happened when I go buy a car, since I have no warranties on anything, I may as well eat the car"::starts with the radiator coolant, as all this action has made him 'overheat', Maybe next time I will have better luck"
As the story comes to an end, SoCal Tom Walters walks by with his In-N-Out bag of goodies and he simply states "Oh Boy" and keeps walking on.
Moral of the story is, if you have a sense of humor, you will probably laugh, and if you dont, you will probably post some non-sensical rubbish back to this story.
::It was another sunny day in California. Corruption in the Rampart Precint of the Los Angeles Police Department was still rampid. Pamela Anderson was still getting beaten by Tommy Lee as he listen to "Smack My Bitch Up" by the infamous English band, "Prodigy", and one Ruben was beginning to take names and kick asses in the best sport in this planet, Football. Meanwhile, one World's Biggest Mark was about to purchase its first car::
Car Sales Man: "Hello, May I help you with anything today?"
Worlds Biggest Mark: "Not really, I am just looking around"
::Five minutes later, World's Biggest Mark is lured to the show room by the smell of freshly, deep-fried ham::
Car Sales Man: "Have you seen anything that you like?"
World's Biggest Mark: "Yeah, I am quite intrested in that Geo Metro that you have over there"
Car Sales Man: ::laughs hysterically, has to dry eyes before he could reply:: "No, really what are you looking for?"
World's Biggest Mark: "I am serious, I am really intrested in that car"
Car Sales Man: "Pardon me, but I think that you need something with a little bit more TORQUE"
World's Biggest Mark: "This is all I can afford this month, my food bill is running high"
Car Sales Man: "Doesnt surprise me, you even drank the grease from the deep fryer"
World's Biggest Mark: ::whipes mouth, belches:: "Sorry,I got thirsty"
Car Sales Man: "Whatever, lets get this paper work started"
::After four hours that saw the sun set on World's Biggest Mark left side, and the right side saw the sun rise, the paper work is all ready and all systems go for World's Biggest Mark new Geo Metro that can only haul 400lbs on a stick shift, and that is the best that the sales manager could do, since the he was getting annoyed at the amount of dead skin that was amounting around the chair that our buddy, Worlds Biggest Mark, was sitting in::
Car Sales Man: "Mr. I only wear one shirt, because that would mean that companies would have to pay extra to third world nations to produce my shirts, and in turn create a whole new booming economy that would force these American Companies out of businness since they would not be able to produce a cheap product from cheap labor to produce a profitable product, thus driving this country in to another reseccion. I mean Mr. Mark, your vehicle is ready in front of the lobby for you to pick up, the attendant will know when you get there, since its hard to not hear you come by"
World's Biggest Mark: "Was that really necessary, fuck you and every kid that ever picked on me. Today, I am a new man, a man with a dream that maybe some day, a company will take it up under its wing to create a chair strong enough for me so that I will be able to show off my purple skinned ankles at wrestling shows, and for my mutants to have the proper transportation to annoy the fuck out of people like one Mr. Ruben"
::As World's Biggest Mark floors it into 1 gear, the torque is not enough to pull the weight inside the car around, thus dropping his transmission before leaving the lot::
World's Biggest Mark: "No not again!, its the second time this week this has happened when I go buy a car, since I have no warranties on anything, I may as well eat the car"::starts with the radiator coolant, as all this action has made him 'overheat', Maybe next time I will have better luck"
As the story comes to an end, SoCal Tom Walters walks by with his In-N-Out bag of goodies and he simply states "Oh Boy" and keeps walking on.
Moral of the story is, if you have a sense of humor, you will probably laugh, and if you dont, you will probably post some non-sensical rubbish back to this story.