Championship Wrestling From Hollywood’s “Milestone” was an event that celebrated six years of endless mediocrity and stupid shit from this TV series that isn’t filmed anywhere near Hollywood, CA. In this review, I take a look at the two episodes that covered this event and the match that went along. Plus I give an update on the Dave Marquez interview that was supposed to happen.
Episode 280
Milestone starts off with token Yapanese interviewer Joshua Shibata interviewing Big Duke. He says he can’t remember when the DEEJ, who was literally buried by John Zandig in his parents’ backyard during a show, hit him with a chair. They’re gonna fight. I couldn’t give two shits about this feud. There’s just nothing interesting about it. Nothing against Duke, it’s just that the DEEJ sucks. After this there’s a snazzy special opening video intro to give this show a special feel. Even though the production of this series is usually awful, the effort they’re putting into the opening packages on these “special”episodes are a good touch. After that, Todd Keneley and the other dork talk. “Sunset Flips On the Sunset Strip” is such a stupid catch phrase. It makes no sense. Fuck you, Todd Keneley. You are the worst wrestling commentator ever. Mike Adamle was worlds better than you.
8 Man Tag Team Elimination Match: Ricky Mandel, Ryan Taylor, fake-Russian Sasha Darevko, and Eric Watts (w/ Ty Matthews) vs. Espiritu, Ryan Kidd, Julius Coleman, Suede Thompson
This was built as an “Rising Stars vs. Establishment” match. It started with the fake-Russian douche getting tied up in the ropes while everyone brawled. It was the only time he ever had a watchable performance in his career. The babyfaces hit a bunch of dives, and Ryan Kidd hit a nice top rope moonsault to the outside which looked cool. Ryan Kidd, who was more entertaining than anyone else in this match, was eliminated first. Ryan Taylor, who was also interesting, was eliminated third and unmasked Espiritu. After they were eliminated, this match became boring and lame. The fake-Russian douche was last eliminated to give the “Rising Stars” the win with Espiritu and Julius Coleman being the last remaining members of their team. This shit was lame after Ryan Kidd was eliminated.
Backstage Joshua Shibata interviews Devin Sparks. He’s supposed to face Rocky Romero, but they started teasing that he might not be there. This was whatever.
DJ Hyde vs. Big Duke
The commentators kept trying to sell this match as something that was going to be brutal and violent. I still can’t get over how ridiculous it is that fucking DJ HYDE is being booked as a main guy on this show. Like, I get it. CZW, United Wrestling Network, all that shit. It’s still fucking hilarious to see this dude lumbering around the ring and being built by this company as a monster. This match was lame. All they did was do some shitty brawling that looked very unconvincing, both guys threw the referee around, and the ref ended the match and ruled it a Double DQ. Fuck, this was stupid. Duke getting squashed on WWE Monday Night Raw was more entertaining than this shit.
Post match shenanigans: Both guys started having a lame brawl around the venue and eventually outside of the building. The fake crowd noise was so bad here. After a break, Josh Shibata interviews Scorpio Sky, saying him and Willie Mack will be going at it on the next episode of the show. Devin Sparks came to the ring and cuts a promo saying Rocky Romero was ducking him. He teased that Rocky wasn’t there, and Rocky’s music began playing. Instead of Rocky, some pudgy Hispanic guy came out in Rocky’s gear. Todd Keneley tried making a bunch of fat jokes. Someone should tell him tell him to look in a mirror before talking shit on anyone’s weight.
Devin Sparks vs. Fake-Rocky Romero
The fans shat on this with “suck” heat. Not “good” heat, but actual X-Pac heat. This was, without a doubt, the WORST segment in all the episodes I’ve seen of Championship Wrestling From Hollywood. From the bad angle, to the heatless match, to Todd Keneley’s shitty ass commentary, everything about this SUCKED SWAMP ASS. What a waste of fucking time. How the fuck is this supposed to make people want to see Rocky Romero have a match with Devin Sparks? Fucking awful. The only thing I can think of anything as cringe-inducing as this was Tony Schiavone cutting a heel promo in TNA.
United Wrestling Network Television Championship Match: Tyler Bateman (c) vs. Johnny Yuma
It’s funny, Johnny Yuma booked himself in this angle where someone got personal with him, and he worked this match just like it was a normal match instead of a title match on a “major” event for the show against a guy who has been part of shenanigans where his family was getting fucked with. Instead of trying to attack Bateman right off the bat, he just did lame bullshit. This match itself was pretty weak. Almost all these matches on these shows are the same shit. Lame strikes and rest holds, and that’s what we saw here. I can’t get over how terrible bookerman Yuma is as a babyface. He’s unlikable, annoying, isn’t entertaining, and is the biggest fucking mook in pro wrestling. Bateman won the match after countering a bunch of contrived looking bullshit from Yuma. This was pretty boring, and the ending looked so disjointed.
Post match shenanigans: Someone in a mask pretending to be Jarek 1:20, fresh off his appearance jobbing on WWE TV recently, came out to distract Yuma, and Jarek 1:20 came from behind without his face paint on and knocked out Yuma. The crowd didn’t give a shit. Then a bunch of geeks (a term I have shameless stolen from Bryan Alvarez) in mask abducted Yuma to the interest of nobody in the crowd. Hopefully this is his way of writing himself off the show.
Episode 281
We start this episode with Josh Shibata interviewing Willie Mack backstage to talk about his match with Sky. It is what it is. We get the special Milestone intro, which again is a nice touch.
Scorpio Sky vs. Willie Mack
I decided to turn off the audio for this match. The commentary is unbearable, and the fans suck, so I just felt like enjoying the in ring work of this match. Willie got some good offense in on Sky with various tosses, slams, as well as hitting his Samoan DropKip up/Standing Moonsault combo. on Sky. Sky also hit a really nice Tope Con Giro on Willie later in the match. This was a good back-and-forth match with both guys getting a good amount of offense in with some cool spots mixed in along with some exciting near falls. CWFH could use more matches like this on their shows, as it would greatly improve the quality of their product. Sky got the win after hitting two flying knees on Willie Mack. Really good match here. This show needs more matches like this on it in order for it to be better.
Backstage with Josh Shibata, where he’s interviewing the insufferable Pac 3. He rambled about shit nobody cares about. After a break, Shibata interviews Peter Avalon about his match against Tito Escondido. I didn’t give a shit about this promo either. It was just more of the same. I beat this guy, that guy, and I’m gonna beat you, catchphrase. This was about as generic as they come with a Jumpin’ Jeff Farmer formula.
Ashley Grace w/ Heather Monroe vs. Ruby Raze
It was obvious that Ashley Grace was going to lose this match. During the match she used her speed to deliver quick attacks on Raze, and Raze would use her size advantage to dominate Ashley. There were some awkward and sloppy moments in the middle of the match. Ashley Grace face planted after slightly overshooting Ruby Raze after hitting a top rope splash. Raze got the win after hitting Belly-to-Back suplex followed by a spear combo. This was ok, but very predictable.
Post match shenanigans: Heather Monroe is checking on Ashley, and Ruby grabbed her, so Heather reacted by elbowing her. She realized she fucked up and got beaten down by Raze. The way she took Raze’s clothesline got a mixed reaction from me, as she stuck her chest out waiting for Raze to hit her, which looked bad. At the same time, I admire the fact that she was willing to be a fucking solider and take that shit. So yeah, props for that.
United Wrestling Network Hollywood Heritage Championship Match: Peter Avalon (c) vs. Tito Escondido
The annoying old white guy plant fan with the shitting notebook paper signs had a “If Tito Wins, We Riot” sign. That made me cringe so hard. The opening chain wrestling sequence in this was a lot of fun, with Tito busting out some nice Judo and grappling techniques. The pace would pick up mid match with both guys busting out some fun lucha sequences. The match started to slow down during the middle portion of the match, which sorta dragged this down a bit, but the finishing stretch picked the pace up a bit. There was a ref bump when Tito hit his finisher on Peter. The match went on as the fake-Marquez son checked on the referee. Peter hit a double knee drop to the back of Tito’s head off the ropes. The fake-Marquez son counted the pinfall, but Tito kicked out. Fake-Marquez son called for the bell.
Post match shenanigans: the fake-Marquez son declared Peter the winner via pin fall. This was stupid. Unless Tito ends up becoming the top babyface and champion, and Peter turns heel, this was a stupid fucking finish to the match.
Final Thoughts
Championship Wrestling From Hollywood’s “Milestone” had a very lackluster first half. The matches weren’t that good, Devin Sparks had the worst segment ever, and no fucks were given about the Johnny Yuma bullshit. The second episode was much better. Willie Mack vs. Scorpio Sky was very good, and Tito Escondido vs. Peter Avalon was a good match up until the shitty finish. CWFH booked themselves into a corner now, as Tito has a legitimate gripe that no heel should ever have, especially when he’s feuding with a babyface champion who is being supported by an authority figure. Unless this angle ends with a double-turn and Tito becoming champion, it’s stupid. In fact, I’m willing to bet this ends with Peter holding the title still, regardless of whether he stays babyface or turns heel. Championship Wrestling From Hollywood really needs help with their creative direction and how their shows are played out, because everything on this series is disjointed and awful. The storytelling is either inconsistent, or just flat out awful, and the matches are boring. This show desperately needs to do better.
And on a final note, a lot of people have been asking me about my previously announced interview with Dave Marquez. I contacted him several times in hopes of doing something in September, but alas, it’s Mid-October and Dave has never responded to my messages or inquiries. Now he’ll say he’s busy producing several TV shows, and that’s fair, but truth be told, I think he’s sorta afraid of doing an interview with me as he’s not the kind of person who likes to do interviews that aren’t full of softball questions in an effort to make a puff-piece about him and his shows. In fact, I imagine an interview with him and I would end up with him pulling a Nancy Grace on the Jim Norton & Sam Roberts Show. and walk out (or hang up, we probably were gonna do a phone interview) after being asked a tough, but fair series of questions.
Now for people wondering what I would’ve been talking to Dave about, I would’ve been asking him about the following subjects:
- His first show in California, UWA, in 1994
- Working with the Inoki Dojo
- NJPW-USA, along with thoughts about NJPW’s current rise in popularity in America
- Joining the NWA, the Showcase series shows, NWA Hollywood.
- The NWA split.
- The current direction of CWFH and his thoughts on whether the show could use improvements and feelings on what certain wrestlers think about the product.
Note: I sent these list of topics to Dave as he wanted to know what we would’ve been going over.
I’m not gonna sit here and bash Dave for ducking me. I understand that these topics would probably give him a hard time, but at the same time I would’ve been fair with the guy and possibly open a dialogue with him. That being said, I doubt Dave will ever do an interview with me, and that’s cool with me. I honestly have things to focus on in life right now and am talking a step back from SCU for a bit, and will be writing on a limited basis. The thing I’m upset about this though is the people who said they were looking forward to this. To you guys, I would like to apologize for disappointing you all like I’ve disappointed many of my ex-girlfriends in the past. You all deserve better than that. So please, accept this video as my apology to you all. And yes, that is Adam Pearce getting into a fight with some fat chick. Enjoy!
